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Nostalgia July 2016

Perfect Score on the ‘Older Than Dirt' Quiz

By Raymond Reid

Party lines on the telephone. I believe we were on a five-party line. Our ring was three longs and two shorts. When Mother picked up the phone and realized other people were talking on it, she hung up after just a minute or two.

A good friend recently sent me an age-related quiz. The quiz contained 16 items. Remembering 13-16 of them qualifies you to be "older than dirt." That would be me, because I remember all 16.

Here they are:

  • Candy cigarettes. They came in a pack like real cigarettes so I could mimic my dad, who smoked Pall Malls. I remember even trying to light one, which infuriated Dad. "What are you trying to do Raymond?" he yelled. "Burn the house down?"
  • Coffee shops with tableside juke boxes. I remember them well. And at the time, I thought they were cool. But I also thought Pat Boone was cool.
  • Home milk delivery in glass bottles. I remember the milkman delivering milk once a week when we lived in Asheboro, N.C. My little brother was born in Asheboro and bore a striking resemblance to the milkman.
  • Party lines on the telephone. I believe we were on a five-party line. Our ring was three longs and two shorts. When Mother picked up the phone and realized other people were talking on it, she hung up after just a minute or two.
  • Newsreels before the movie. I remember how boring they were and wondering when "Tom and Jerry" was going to start?
  • TV test patterns. They came on around 11:00 p.m. on all three of our channels, signaling it was time to go to bed.
  • Pea shooters. My pea-shooting antics once got me into big trouble with a teacher. But I was not the one who shot her in the back of the head. That was my story and I stuck to it.
  • Howdy Doody. I remember Buffalo Bob, too! That show got me hooked on sugar-filled Welch's grape juice.
  • 78 rpm records. Barely, but I do remember them.
  • 33 1/3 rpm records. Yes, I have a whole box full featuring such notables such as Andy Williams, The Lettermen, Herb Alpert and the Tijuana Brass and, of course, Pat Boone.
  • 45 rpm records. Yes. They had a hit song on one side and a dud on the other.
  • Metal ice trays with levers. Yes, but I always spilled half the water trying to get them into the freezer.
  • Blue flashbulbs. Yes. I even remember flash cubes which contained four bulbs, and automatically turned after each picture.
  • Cork popguns. Yes. The cork had a string attached to it, making it impossible to get to the back of the teacher's head.
  • Studebakers. Yes. We even had one. It was a '55 two-tone green model and the ugliest car I had ever seen. I never drove it on a date. Instead, I drove the less ugly '55 two-tone green Dodge Coronet.
  • Wash tub wringers. I faintly remember my grandmother having one. She would wring out the clothes before heading out to the clothesline.

Wonder what my grandson will remember when he gets to be my age? If Sam remembers cable TV, iPods, X-boxes, laptop computers, Big Bird, credit cards, fax machines, postage stamps and SIRI, he surely will qualify to be "older than dirt."

 

Raymond Reid can be contacted a This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.

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