One of the most frequently asked questions of seniors (other than perhaps “How do you feel?”) is: What do you do with yourself all day, now that you're retired?
Our friend suggested sarcastically that we spend our time waiting in doctors' waiting rooms.
Seriously though, the question – when coming from a younger person – touches on a significant topic for younger and older people alike, especially when we consider the pursuit of happiness, an important element of life.
Take an employed person who spends approximately one-third of life sleeping (a common concept) and at least another third working, plus travel time (too often in a job not that well liked), and take a retired person who spends one-third asleep and with very little meaningful activity during the third that was previously devoted to working.
Knowing that there are many people who like their jobs and many retirees who have fulfilling activities, both examples lead to the thought that whether you are working or retired, meaning, purpose and excitement remain key ingredients of a happy life.
Who can judge, however, what makes a man or a woman happy in life?
In a lingering memory that involved the pursuit of happiness, my wife and I were on a cruise ship going to Alaska a number of years ago, when we met a couple that happened to live about seven miles from where we did at the time on Long Island in New York. I was starting to contemplate plans for retiring in the future and, of course, a conversation on retirement ensued.
The husband of the other couple was an accountant. "I'm never going to retire," he said, "because I have a fear that if I retire, I would start to deteriorate physically and mentally. It happened to my friend."
Perhaps because there was an apparent look of surprise on my face, he added, "I'm not kidding. I'm serious."
A while ago on periodic Sunday mornings in a secluded, relatively traffic-free area of New Jersey, I used to take bicycle rides with a friend who had gotten me involved in biking for exercise. His friend, a retired engineer who also lived in an adult community, was seriously involved in activities that included painting, photography, writing, bridge, a social club, religious studies, and volunteer work, in addition to biking.
How many activities are too many or enough?
A person I used to work with retired to a golf resort community in Pinehurst, N.C. He and his wife were ardent golfers. A few years later, he told me: "How many times a week can you play golf?" The former owner of a small insurance company, he started to look for a part-time job. In any event, as many of us do, I know men and women in their 30s and in their 70s who are bored by aspects of their lives, and I know persons in these age groups who find excitement in their lives.
Happiness and boredom and excitement and contentment and fulfillment are lifestyle concepts that philosophers have wrestled with over the centuries. As individuals, perhaps we are only touched by a feeling about their meaning, and they merely remain in the mind's eye of each individual beholder.
In any case, as many more begin to near retirement age, coupled with the fact that life expectancy is steadily increasing, so that we will have a large elderly population in the years ahead, many issues lie ahead waiting to be resolved by this nation and other countries.
Some of those issues include Social Security, the health care system, the shifting of retirement ages, people staying in jobs longer, job opening for younger persons, and relationships between children and elderly persons. In short, our social fabric will be woven with an increasing abundance of graying hair, and hopefully we will figure out how to make the fabric fit and wear well.
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