Meet our writers



September 2017
Strictly Humor

What I Want Back

I want back the stunning sunsets and full moonrises I saw coming but didn’t watch because of some stupid self-imposed sidetracks that ultimately didn’t matter, but those suns and moons sure did.

August 2017
Agelessly Yours

Stripped of Her Softest Possession

Never developed those facial muscles. I’m so sick of hearing that it takes more effort to frown than it does to grin — not for me it doesn’t.

Ernie's World

Spanish Jeopardy!

"Women could not go out alone. Could not work. Could not shop by themselves. Or date. But the tobacco company hired young women to roll cigars." Probably smoked less than the men, I figured.

July 2017
Laverne's View

Who Am I?

My DNA suggests that my muscle composition is common in elite power athletes. In reality, if you Google “uncoordinated” my photo will appear.... I was so clumsy, and without muscle power, that when it came time to climb the hanging ropes in gym, I never got further than sitting on the knot.

Agelessly Yours

Anyone Can Write Articles?

It’s not the highlight of one’s life to be approached without warning by an-in-your-face dopey dame who greets you with, “Ya know, anybody can write articles."

Ernie's World

An Apple a Day?

A large, humorless guy said: “I’ve got to frisk you.” I assumed the pose. I got a small itch in one of those hard to reach places. I was tempted to ask him to scratch it.


Kneedy People!

While I was hobbling along as fast as I could go, a guy in a wheelchair was griping at me to speed it up, and a toddler in a stroller was shaking his fist and crabbing at me to get over to the right so he could pass. 

June 2017
Add One More Day...

I Can’t Believe It’s Not Better

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m not a complete dolt. I know the difference between a noun and a verb, aisle or isle, their, there or they’re. I got some smarts … just none that relate to anything particularly useful to future generations.

Agelessly Yours

On the Corner of Despondency and Despair

No wonder people’s mental health is deteriorating. We're being recognized by our passport photos, which are about as flattering as a police line-up mug shot.

Ernie's World

How Black is Black?

My stomach grumbled.

“What was that?” a young girl on the tour asked.

“Sounded like a wounded bat.”

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